Here's what happened...During the last day of our weekend workshop, our facilitator asked us to brainstorm ideas for our final session together. Several folks stood up and shared and I was one of them. During the next break, someone came up to me and said, "I need to get complete with you about something." Prior to this conversation, I had not had any interaction with this man during the entire weekend. I uttered, "Okay" and then he proceeded to tell me how stupid he thought my idea was.

One of the things this program encourages participants to be is "fully self-expressed". I'm a huge proponent of saying what's on your mind and telling others your truths, but I have to admit I was caught quite off-guard by this man's comments. Even though he didn't tell me I was stupid, I still felt like a six year-old girl who'd just been sent to the front of the classroom with a dunce cap on her head. He shared a few other things with me (unrelated to my idea) that he hated and then he was quiet. For a few moments, I totally took his opinion personally and felt I needed to go on the defensive. Instead of firing back a snotty reply, I surprised myself by saying, "Do you feel better now for having shared that with me?" He said, "Yes' and that pretty much was the end of our conversation.

I don't know how he felt as he walked away, but I know I was really bothered by our exchange. Ever felt as though you've had a sign on your forehead that said, "Feel free to tell me anything that's on your mind. I can handle it."? That's how I felt. It took a couple days of looking at what happened and how I interpreted our conversation before I could get that what he said to me was not about me. The truth is...we all take things way too personally at times and when we do, we often get stuck in our own yuck. I didn't say much after he said what he did because I immediately assumed the worst and began making up stories rather than just asking him what the conversation was really all about for him. I don't like to admit this, but it's taking me a lot longer to give up trying to understand the reason why he shared what he did with me.

Letting go of having to know is a challenging thing for many of us. Think about it...one of the very first questions we ask when we're about three years old is, "Why?" and we never stop asking it. The search for meaning and purpose is a large part of being human, but how might life be different if we could accept there are some things we don't have to know? What if we could just realize some of our experiences will be beyond our understanding and simply trust they're occurring for our greater good? After spending a couple weeks wallowing in the world of "Why?" here are a few suggestions I'd like to offer you on how to get unstuck;

5 Things to Give Up When You Get Stuck

1) Your ego

2) Your judgments

3) Your expectations

4) Your assumptions

5) Your stories

Giving up what we make up, are attached to and what we don't get doesn't mean we stop asking questions and accept everything as is. It means we take time to go within and see what there is for us to learn from our experiences. There is profound freedom in letting go of what you don't know and letting in what's true for you. Henry Ford was right...you do feel much bigger.

More birthday bashes will be had this weekend as my husband and nephew will celebrate their day of birth one day (and forty-four years) apart from one another. Before heading to my parents' house for the holiday, James and I will spend a couple of days at Breitenbush Hot Springs. I'm looking forward to sleeping, soaking in the tubs, sleeping, eating yummy vegetarian meals and did I already say I'll be sleeping? I love my cat, but the thought of having a few nights of uninterrupted rest make me so happy.

This is the last shout-out for the beach retreat I'm having January 18-20. There's still room and you still have time to register for this relaxing and rejuvenating weekend event. Three spots are left for last-minute decision-makers, pleasure procrastinators and I-just-heard-of-it-for-the-first-time folks. If you'd like to take a personal time out after the hectic holiday season, be sure to check out more details about Begin Again – A Weekend Sojourn by the Sea on my website. Perhaps this is just the kind of "experience gift" you'd like to ask someone to give you this Christmas. Or perhaps it's something you'll schedule in your calendar and give to yourself. If you want to play, don't delay. Pick up the phone and call me today.

Care to share what these questions stir up in you?

Send me an e-mail. I welcome your thoughts and will respond to all e-mails received.

~Playful Spirit Productions' mission is to inspire people to show up, be real and play big in life.~